Today was just one of those days when I am reminded why exactly I chose to be in this profession. People ask me all the time how I do this job...isn’t it sad, don’t you get frustrated, don't you want to scream sometimes, etc etc. Typically, yes there are bad days, as with any profession, but for me when there is one good day out of god knows how many it makes it all worth it.
Anyways…for the reasoning. Yesterday I had a young client, I think 17 or 18 years old, come to the program for his regular scheduled time. During class, he was presented with the information to attend a job fair in Philadelphia for the next day (today). I could see the panic in his face. He came to me during his break and expressed that he did not want to go to the job fair. I simply asked him why and he stated he was just “not ready.” I talked to him for a while about this and encouraged him that he needed to sometimes step out of his comfort zone and take chances. He still was not having it. He was practically begging me not to make him go. I would not budge. I told him that even if he did not talk to anyone the whole job fair I still wanted him to go and just see what it was like. I think he might have wanted to kill me. I did not care. They usually do in the beginning.
Generally, people have a preconception of fathers who fail to pay their child support. Deadbeat Dads most would say. Yea, they are fully responsible for the lack of payments, and I am never ready to challenge any mother struggling to get this support, but I see a whole different side to these men. I see their story. I help figure out the reasons as to why these men may not work, their barriers, personal issues, past experiences, etc. I do not judge them upon first introduction. And most of all, I believe that some are ready to change.
If you haven’t taken a ride through Chester lately you will have absolutely no idea what these guys see on an everyday basis. For this particular client it is terrifying for him to see anything other than his neighborhood. The street is where he grew up and it is where he is most comfortable staying in. No one pushes him to see what’s out there, no one encourages him to get his GED, no one demands he abide by rules. He was brought up to believe that he will make the most money on the streets. It’s the only way to survive in these neighborhoods. If you deny the streets you become an outcast. This is all new to him. And I am sure most know how it feels to be put in new situations and for some how it feels to be an outcast. It is scary. Downright terrifying.
So anyway, we got this kid set up with some nice interview clothing. I am sick of looking at his butt hanging out of his pants. I correct him just about every 10 minutes. I have even offered to buy him a belt but I know he won’t wear it. He just tells me I am crazy. We gave him some more encouragement and sent him home for the day. Just from my experience, I expected that he was just not going to show up the next morning. Well, I was wrong.
At 7:30 am this kid came walking through my door looking like a guy straight outta GQ. No joke. He was still terrified, but at least he looked good. I wish I could post a picture of him but due to confidentiality I would pretty much lose my job. I was seriously almost in tears. I was so proud of him and he did not even walk out the door yet. He wanted to practice introducing himself to people and had this whole script he was going to read on his way there. My heart melted.
Upon his return I was introduced to a whole different kid, well, adult I might now be able to say. He was beaming from ear to ear. I asked how it went and he said great. Another client then came up to me and thanked me for pushing the young kid to go. He told me that he got right out there and was introducing himself to all different employers. Yea he has never worked a job in his whole life, but now at least, he was willing to try.
This may seem so simple and trivial to some, but for me it just means so much. It is a constant reminder that even the smallest things make the biggest difference. I am so proud to be a part of these men’s lives and I am happy to know that I can help them see that life outside the streets does exist. Thanks to this young man, today I will leave work happy and humble.
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