The right kinda

Okay so I love Girls.  Of course I do.  I mean how could I not?  But anyway.  This past weeks episode was real different.  I wasn't the biggest fan of this unrealistic? situation happening to Hannah and was super quick to judge.  Especially with my man sitting beside me, making under the breath blows, of how this is, yes, again unrealistic. 

But then it kind of dawned on me.  This is my kinda sorta my life.  I have someone that treats me with so much love every minute of the day.  And I never believe it.  Never.  I keep wondering when I am going to wake up.  I only have ever expected the most shitty treatment from any guy I've been with.  And the worst part about it is that I actually accepted it.  It's disgusting. 

I spent so much of my life accepting that I would just be that girl to experience everything.  For everyone to see me as that girl that gets to just do everything because she's not tied down.  To be the role model for all girls out there who couldn't find the right kinda love. 

I think back to nights where I would lay in my bed and wish upon everything I could wish upon to experience love.  The real kind.  Not the shitty kind of accepting whatever comes your way kinda love. 

And I got it.  I got my WISH.  And now I can try and believe it, accept it.  And I can still be that girl who experiences things, but this time, with him by my side.  And I can do everything and anything I used to...just now with my better half. 

So...if you are sitting at home, thinking this will never happen to you, well....It will.  And when it does, you will look back and see everything so different.   So stop accepting the shitty of shitty and know, just know, it will come.  Promise.