richard on soulmates

“People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you’ll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. But to live with a soul mate forever? Nah. Too painful. Soul mates, they come into your life just to reveal another layer of yourself to you, and then leave.

A soul mates purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master…”

~Richard from Texas

Let me first start off by saying that it came to me last night, that as many times as I have read this over, and read this to everyone who I am close with, I have never written about it myself. As I was reading it for the...I don’t know, nine thousandth time...I was reminded how much it has shaped my life, my way of thinking. I am not exactly sure why I insist on flipping through my ripped apart book anymore to read these words because I know each and every word by heart. I can recite this shit in my sleep. It is imprinted somewhere inside of me. I could quite possibly write a book itself on what this small excerpt has taught me, but I won’t, cause simply I just don’t have the time to jumble all these thoughts or more clearly tear apart these words.

From the time we ((as in girls/cause boys are taught different)) first lay eyes on our first crush we begin to think, “oh my he is my soul mate.” Fuck all that noise. It’s all bullshit. Anyone who goes through life thinking there’s one person, just one, out there that is their soul mate is just fucking crazy. Disagree with me, whatever, it’s my opinion, my blog, so on.... and you are wrong. The truth is, as it says, is that this ‘soulmate’ is just something you want, and have been taught to desire your whole life. Once you break free from this, you will actually see who your soul mates actually are, and who they have been.

Some of the relationships I have been involved in the past couple of years have been both eccentric and sometimes completely irrational; however, they have seriously made me into the person I am today. And I do not expect it to stop here. I mean...this definitely cannot be it. There’s so much more for me to learn, to experience, to love. I could go on and on....blah blah blah.

Anyways, most importantly, the character in the book, Elizabeth, continues to say to Richard, about her “soul mate” David.....

Liz: “But I love him.”
Richard: “So love him.”
Liz: “But I miss him.”
Richard: “So miss him. Send him some love and light every time you think about him, then drop it.”

I cannot begin to explain to you how much I have taken this advice, this “send some light and love.” Sometimes it backfires on me, but fuck it whatever, this is my life, these are my feelings. Only I have to deal with them inside. I have the ability to shut off my brain. I have learned to meditate at the right times. I am responsible for my own happiness. If I think about someone, and remember how important they have been to me, I tend to let them know, consciously or subconsciously. I am no longer afraid to put myself out there, sometimes, to look like a fool, just to remind someone I am thinking of them. There was a time in my life where I was completely shut off, walls all around, and quite frankly that was by far the worst time in my life. I will never, ever, ever go back there. Promise you, me, god knows whoever, that.

The conversation goes on between both Liz and Richard only to end with... “You gotta stop wearing your wishbone where your backbone oughtta be.”

And isn’t that the fucking truth.

I think I’ll stop here.

Attraversiamo.