Today marks four years since my Aunt Lisa has passed. Lisa was such an important part of my life. For those that had the opportunity to know her will understand that she had the ability to just light up a room. She was like a second mother to all of us. She loved us all with more than you can ever imagine someone can.
The fact that I am approaching my wedding day without her, without her ever knowing Steve, makes me feel a bit empty, not from sadness, but from the shadows where emptiness resides. I wish only, that he could have known her. But then I think, he does. He knows me, and I carry her with me everyday. That is comforting, just as she was to me, during all her days, even those leading to her death.
I am not typically one to grieve one's death with sadness. I learned at a very young age that people would be taken from our lives, and it is how we chose to honor these people that will always matter. Death, as I have said before, has taught me more about Life than any experiences have ever offered me. That may seem morbid to some, but it is real for me. It is what I have learned that helps me each day to go on, and to love, everything that is given to me, with a pure heart.
Sometimes that reality gets lost, but days like today, when the wind blows so freely, and my heart fills with such love, that I remember my aunts hands in mine. I remember that I have the most amazing family, and the best kind of lover, and the most supportive friends anyone could ever have. But most of all I remember that I will continue to live my life with passion, and intensity, and most importantly love.
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